When I look back at myself 10 years ago I was very fit and active. I had no reason to diet and exercise, I hate but I wanted and never gain an ounce only because every day at work I was working out for 10 to 12 hours.
I used to wear muscle shirts, I used to be comfortable enough to buy shirts one or two sizes too small for me. I used to feel good about myself, I used to be able to eat but I wanted and never think twice. Only in recent years has it really affected me the way it does now. When I looked down on that scale not too long ago and saw that I was 300 pounds I gasped. I asked myself, how can I let myself get this way. I did this to myself and how? By changing the way I live my life, but not changing what I put in my mouth.
Today I am wearing a shirt that I love. I bought it about a year and a half ago in an effort to feel good about myself, The only problem is that it made me realize how out of shape I truly am. Today I've taken some time to reflect back on what I used to be like how are used to feel every day, and how much I used to enjoy the feeling of soreness after working out.
At first it seems difficult to understand that I was going to have to lose at least 100 pounds to get back to where I'd be comfortable. Now that I've gotten started, I take it one data time. One day, one meal, and when I'm working out I take it one minute at a time.
Saturday mornings are very difficult for me to justify getting up and going to the gym, because I always have other things I should be doing. If I make the decision not to go to the gym on Saturday morning, I at least work out in the morning in my own living room. This morning, my wife and I together worked out to a YouTube video that we found using our kettle bells. One of the exercises I chose to do even after the YouTube routine was complete, was push-ups. Six weeks ago when I first started this journey I was unable to do even one push-up. I couldn't support my own bodyweight, not for 1 inch up for 1 inch down. This morning I hit a milestone, I did a push-up, but not just one, I couldn't just stop at one. I pushed myself through to complete 20 push-ups, I don't remember the last time I was able to do something like that.
Yesterday I exercised a lot, I worked out for probably three hours. I didn't eat anything extra, I need exactly as I normally would. That dinner we had pasta with pasta sauce and chicken, for our veggie we had lots of asparagus. I truly do love eating right, it just feels so good to know that I ate what my body needs. Now I'm not saying that I don't have struggles, as a matter fact last night the couple hours after dinner while we were out and about waiting for our photos to be edited my wife and I were both feeling very hungry. We drove around for several minutes looking for a place that we could stop and get something as a snack that wouldn't completely unravel our day. My wife made a suggestion after just a couple of moments, that we should just chill piece of gum and drink a water. So I hop in the back of the van and got us each a 20 ounce bottle of water, I chugged mine like there was no tomorrow and I chewed my gum happily. A few minutes later, I actually felt full. I didn't feel the need to eat anything else the rest of the night. When I woke up this morning and weighed myself and saw that I had lost 2 pounds over just the last 24 hours, I was astonished. That is what losing weight is all about.
Losing weight is taking things one data time and in some cases one minute at a time. The small wins are the wins that will keep you moving forward. Reword yourself often and you won't regret it. My wife and I have a goal to each lose 100 pounds by this Christmas. If we reach that goal, we are going to be treating each other to a cruise for the first time ever.
I remember in high school gym class being the best at set ups. I could you more sit ups faster than anyone else in my class. I never realized how out of shape I was until my trainer asked me to do some sit ups. The first day I completed 15 sit ups, and that was excruciating. I had to push myself through each one individually. On Thursday, when I did sit ups again I was able to complete 30 set ups in the same 60 seconds that I completed 15 sit ups just one week prior. Just last night there was something on the floor in front of me that I needed to retrieve for my son, for many years I haven't been able to lean straightforward and pick something up off the floor I have to either use my feet, or lean to the site down to get it. The last night, I leaned down using my abs to pull me from the chair not my hand push against the back of the chair, and I retrieve the toy. These seemingly stupid little things that so many people take for granted, are so difficult for those of us who have put on weight. It is such an emotional thing for me to make even these small changes, I can't wait to see what my next milestones are.
I'm writing this blog as my personal journal and a journal for all of those who would like to read. I hope that somebody out there who is struggling to lose weight, or struggling to find the motivation to start their own journey finds even the smallest amount of inspiration from my experiences.
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